Wait for It

Poinsettia growing against a wall near Ensenada, Mexico

"...but they who put their hope in the Lord will renew their strength.

They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary,

they will walk and not be faint."

Isaiah 40:31

Yesterday I was reading a book about how to think theologically (ironically, it is titled, "How to Think Theologically"). It's about the nitty gritty of how a person's theology impacts decisions in real life.

We all do think theologically. We act upon our theological beliefs all the time. Mostly, we draw upon our "embedded" theology, the stuff we acquired growing up from the culture around us. If we are really interested in theology, at some point we pull out those embedded ideas and examine them. Then we may decide to develop and refine our theology to give it a foundation and substance. That's what I am doing in seminary right now.

Anyway, the question was: how does my theology work for me in a crisis? What about when I meet up with the unexpected, the sad or the frightening events of life?

The answer was illustrated by the story of a woman who came to stay with her mother in her last illness. She was overwhelmed at first and thought she could not face these last days with her mom. Then she told herself to wait a moment and let it all sink in.

She took in the scene in the hospital room, she allowed her feelings to fill her heart and she took full measure of the condition her mother was in. Then she considered what would be the right thing to do. What actions would match her actual theology of family?

In the moments of waiting she remembered who her mother really was to her and what her faith dictated in terms of caring for her. In her heart she had stored up biblical principles to guide her in the situation. With those principles in mind, she moved past all of her fears and sorrows and she spent the next few days ministering to her mother's needs, delighting in her and loving her until she passed into eternity.

That is theology in action, encountering a challenge and having your true beliefs rise to the surface to guide your actions. It's also the way that you find out whether you have a solid theology to rely upon. Theology can either be acquired haphazardly or systematically, but I think it is best to be proactive and build your theology. I could go into all the ways there are to do that, but my previous blog talks about one of the best ways. Meet God everyday and discuss life with Him.

Then wait for the testing that is sure to come. When it arrives, wait again until that theology you have built takes over and gives you the way to go forward.

Quiet Time To Go

What is a Quiet Time?

It's the time I spend with the Lord, usually first thing in the morning. It is my time to read the Bible and talk with the Lord in prayer. It's where He and I work out life together.

I keep my journal, One Year Bible and another devotional book in a ZipLoc bag. I started doing this when I wanted to throw them into my backpack to travel. The bag keeps them from getting all beaten up.

This is what it looks like when I get started. I have the basket tray on the sofa beside me so that I can keep my teacup within reach and not spill it.

My journal is a medium size spiral bound notebook with my favorite kind of pen clipped to it.

My Bible reading comes from the One Year Bible, with its cool bookmark picturing the Eagle Nebuli.

My devotional is "The Rule of Benedict" with commentary by Joan Chittester. (I'll tell you more about that another time.)

Outside of the picture is the bookcase where I can grab a dictionary, Bible dictionary, Bible atlas and Bible commentary when I need them.

A few feet away is a big basket with fleecy blankets in case I need to put one over my knees on chilly mornings. Sometimes I light a candle to warm up the space as well.

Those are the pratical elements of my Quiet Time habit. I didn't really plan it, it has just evolved over many years as I worked out how to make it more convenient to meet with the Lord.

I think simple solutions are the best.

It would be very nice to hear how other people have a Quiet Time.

Before I was Afflicted...

In my September 3 blog I mentioned that I was on a quest to "do what comes unnaturally" in adding simple spiritual disciplines into my life, and that I would let you know how it goes. So, here is an update.

A couple of weeks ago I visited my doctor after going through all the blood tests and exams that accompany bi-annual wellness check-ups. She came into the room and said, "You have awesome health!" She went through each test result with me and she was right, I'm blessed with good health. But then we came to the fasting glucose test and she pointed out that my fasting blood sugar has risen just over the line into "borderline" diabetes. She said it was nothing to worry about, but that I should be aware of it.

Back home from my appointment, I thought I would look further into what someone with "borderline" diabetes should be doing to stay healthy. My dad, my sister and my nephew have diabetes and my aunt died of pancreatic cancer. I am quite aware of the effects of diabetes on people's health.

I learned that some experts say that there is no such thing as "borderline" diabetes. One can't be a little bit diabetic, just as one cannot be a little bit pregnant. Anyone who has a rising insulin/blood sugar imbalance should begin to live as if they are controlling diabetes.

That day I cut sugar right out of my diet. I began seeking the most healthy ways to eat, the best ways to exercise and anything else that will keep my blood sugar under control. It wasn't that hard to start making changes in my behavior since I had already begun the discipline of subtracting bad habits and beginning good ones in my life. The Lord and I had already been talking about these things most of this year.

Last week I read Psalm 119:67-68 and memorized it because it really spoke to my situation.

"Before I was afflicted I went astray,

but now I obey your word.

You are good and what you do is good.

Teach me your decrees."

These verses are so true! Before I was afflicted with concern about diabetes, I was much more ambivalent about how to care for my body properly. It was like a game, making changes and becoming more disciplined in my behavior, but now I see the Lord had something bigger in mind for me. He already knew the real condition of my health and he was laying the groundwork for me to get out of dangerous habits.

I was tempted to play with the lessons in discipline God was giving me before, and I could easily have strayed back to bad, old habits, but the Lord has changed that attitude. Now I am committed to obedience.

The Lord is so good! He has been good to me and what he has done is good. Now I am seated at his feet and ready for the next lessons in this school of spiritual discipline.

Good Humor

From "The Rule of Benedict" by Joan Chittister, here is something that has made me stop and think:

"The tenth step of humility is that we are not given to ready laughter,

for it is written: 'Only fools raise their voices in laughter'."

The halls of Benedictine monasteries do not ring with raucous laughter. But before we conclude that Benedictines must be a pretty dour lot, let's think about what makes people laugh. The current election season was loaded with laughter. There were parodies, satires and witticisms filling the air every time we turned on the TV and, depending upon your point of view, these things made you laugh...or make you angry and uncomfortable. These were laughs gained at the expense of someone's dignity or reputation. Maybe we laughed because we enjoyed seeing other folks squirm when we didn't agree with them, or maybe we just laughed because the joke was witty and clever.

Why would St. Benedict have a problem with this?

Benedict didn't actually want to stop laughter as much as he wanted the members of the community to examine what they laughed at and why. What does it say about us when we laugh at things that are crude or sinful? What is in our hearts when we laugh at people whom we should treat with respect or compassion? What is the character of a nation that allows its votes to be swayed by the exaggerated comedy of late night TV, who gets its news and insights from satirists and jokesters?

How easily we lose control of the direction of our own opinions when we let ourselves be led by laughter. We find ourselves laughingly agreeing with ideas that might be repugnant to us if we heard them presented in serious conversation. We dismiss our reaction by saying, "It was only a joke."

Benedict would say that what we laugh at tells something about who we are. It is better to stop laughing and start thinking if we find ourselves lining up with views that actually oppose our better judgment just because the speaker is funny.

Better to replace laughter with good humor, the kind that responds gently and respectfully to the experiences of others. The Benedictines do laugh together, but it is at the kinds of things that come from innocence, not from malicious intent. Benedict is in favor of the laughter that bubbles up in the presence of surprises and unexpected happy events. He encourages us to greet each other with smiles and the sounds of joy that come from our loving and encouraging hearts.

One can't help laughing delightedly at the sweet antics of children at play. We laugh with each other when something silly happens. We laugh for sheer joy when we are carefree and playing together. This is laughter that comes from good humor. It comes from a clean heart that doesn't despise one's fellow man.

Oh, to have a mind that is discerning and a heart full of good humor. Then we are less likely fall into laughing at the things of which we should be ashamed or by which we should be saddened. Then we will be able to lead the world toward goodness instead of following it into the darkness of thinly veiled hatred and prejudice.

Good humor is lighthearted and it brings light into the hearts of others.

Lost Tools of Learning

Please, please read the following article by Dorothy Sayers. It is for everyone who wants to learn--or teach others.

http://www.gbt.org/text/sayers.html

Doing what comes unnaturally...

Sometimes that best thing I can do is make a small, but simple decision NOT to do what comes naturally. A few months ago I decided not to eat sweets when I am by myself. It seemed like a silly thing to make a decision about, and it was really just an experiment in self control, but it has led to interesting results.

I have lost a few pounds, for instance, but I have also lost an annoying compulsion to treat myself with sugar when I am discouraged, tired or bored. I have had numerous meaningful conversations with myself about what I would do instead of eating a cookie or some chocolate and I have had to remember why I made this decision. I have eaten apples or nuts or nothing at all because I decided I didn't really need anything. Obviously, I have stumbled into a healthy habit. It is interesting to note that my regret over not having a treat has lasted only moments, but the satisfaction of practicing self control lasts for days.

Also, these small decisions have given me courage to make bigger decisions. I now know that if I say no to myself in a healthy way I can make it stick. I have learned that it's not so hard to make it through a day without a cookie. The next day it's easier and after a week or so, I hardly think about it at all. Once the decision is made, I just stick with it.

All of this has led to a reverse in my thinking process and I am starting to ADD a few things into my life that I think are worth doing. Just as I chose a few things I will never do, I am choosing a couple of things I hope I will always do. They also come unnaturally to me.

For instance, I plan to make sure that I read my Bible everyday, without excuses. I am a pretty avid Bible reader already, but I want to raise the quality of what I do. I will use my One Year Bible, but I hope I will also find other creative ways to think about the Bible. Maybe I will incorporate it into art projects or home decorating...maybe pictures of this will show up on my blog...don't hold your breath.

I also plan to learn how to pray without ceasing. Fortunately, the Bible (which I read daily!) says unceasing prayer is possible and I am picking up a lot of good hints from people who are way ahead of me on this, so I should be able to overcome my natural lack prayerfulness eventually. I don't expect 100% success in the first 10 years or so, but after that I should be pretty good at it. Meanwhile, I will have spent a lot of good time developing a useful prayer life. It's a good goal so I plan to allow myself plenty of time to succeed at it.

The trick is to be patient and not try to do too much at once. I know I am doing what comes unnaturally, so I am going to give myself grace. I think that there may be temporary discomfort in reminding myelf to do something unnatural that I said I would do, but the benefits will last for years. If I can't pray without ceasing every day, at least my commitment to try means that I will be praying more than I was. If I find it hard to read the One Year Bible everyday, at least my commitment to read the Bible everyday means I will probably read it more than I did before.

Just as I have been surprised by the results of my commitment not to eat sweets alone, I hope I will be surprised by the results of making a commitment to read the Bible and pray more everyday. Little changes can have a pretty cool result. I'll let you all know how it goes.

Ah, My Longsuffering Friends...# 8 Vespers has Arrived

My dear husband has been pointing out to me that I have neglected this blog. For all who have not abandoned me in this long interval, here is the story of Vespers, perhaps the sweetest of the Hours.

Vespers is the hour of gathering in and the lighting of the lamps. The work day has ended for most of the us and we have tied up the loose ends of what we were doing during the day. Now we turn for home as darkness descends and the lamps begin to glow. The evening meal is being prepared and we begin the transition to a peaceful close to the day.

In the monastery the monks may choose this time to walk in the garden on their way to prayer. I have sometimes gone out to my own back garden to light a lamp or candle when it is time for Vespers. Surrounded by my flowers, vegetables and trees, I watch the light fade from the sky and the stars come out and I have a sense that the creatures of the world are coming home to their nests and dens. My neighbors are gathering with their families all around me and my children are with their spouses in their homes. Soon we will have our evening meal, followed by a good night of rest.

Some days I may come to the Hour of Vespers with unresolved conflicts inside. I may have prayed in the Hour of None for forgiveness, and the ability to forgive others, but that may not have lifted the whole burden of concern from my shoulders. I may still be holding onto pieces of the day and trying to put them together in ways that make sense.

Vespers is the time to let go of all of that and place it into God's hands. He has made the night for sleep and He wants me to come to my place of rest with an untroubled heart. I do not have the strength, wisdom or power to resolve all of life's issues everyday, but God has promised to oversee all that concerns me and Vespers is the time to release those things to Him.


Since Vespers is the time of gathering in, it is also the Hour to enter into fellowship with those who share my home. Vespers prepares us to be hospitable to each other, to listen to each other's stories and help each other toward a peaceful close to the day. This is the time for loving greetings and genuine interest in each other.

T.S. Eliot points out that "In our rhythm of earthly life we tire of light. We are glad when the day ends, when the play ends...the day is long for work or play." (from his poem, Choruses from the Rock)

Vespers is the gentle transition from the glare of the day into the serenity of the evening. Breathe deeply the evening air and pause to watch the changing of the light in the world around you. Turn on the lamps, greet your loved ones and share together in a prayer of thanks for another day of Grace. Let God be God and trust Him to carry on for you while you prepare for rest.

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There is liturgy that goes with each of the Hours that I am mentioning in this blog. There are verses to read, songs to sing or chant and prayers to pray. The best way to learn about the Hours is to stay with a community that practices them, but many of us will never do that. I hope that will not discourage us from bringing these practices of prayer into our lives. My own experience is that it is hard to remember to observe all of the Hours through the day, but I find that I am more mindful of prayer simply because I am aware of the passing of these Hours.

It may be best to choose one or two of the Hours to practice in your day. If all you observe is Vespers, for instance, your day will still be enriched and your life with your family will be blessed. Lauds may become part of your daily Quiet Time or Sext may be part of your lunch time. Many Christian communities choose these three, Lauds, Sext and Vespers as their observance of the Hours of prayer.

We are nearing the end of our day of prayer. Next is Compline, the completing of the circle of Hours.